It's been awhile...

....but not long enough to write a real blog, yet.

We moved back to Michigan. Seriously. That happened. We arrived August 3, I believe. I can't believe that we're back here. Living with Kev. In GRap. It's so weird yet so right.

There's more to be said, on that topic... but I'm too tired. Certainly will post more on this notion later.

I'm 24. Good god.

-Meg

The things I'll miss...

You know the kind. You hear them coming well before you see them... But you know what you're about to encounter, anyway. The loud-talking into the cell phone is only the beginning.

Dangling plastic heart earrings.

Tight, light grey stretch pants. Camel everywhere. Insert vomit here.

Hot pink tee with Japanese character that inquisitively asks, "Cuddle?"

Oh yeah. Bring it in for the real thing, baby.

Life In My Family.

My sister wants to fly one way to come down and drive home with me for the big move. Having never flown before, she's a little confused and befuddled by the flight booking past the 10 day mark thing. Apparently, so are my parents, as shown as this rapid fire series of texts from the sister...

K: how come it was 89 before?
K: what the fuckkkkkk
K: god damn indiscisives
K: call dad
K: call the house he accidentally hung up on you

Welcome to my world.

Mother of the year.

Interactive freelancer walks in.

He says, "I just walked by a mom and baby getting into a car, and I notice that the baby has a helmet on.


"I think to myself, 'Why does a kid that young have a helmet on? Weird.’


"Then the mom goes to put the kid in the car, and whacks it's head on the car doorframe."

It's so hot my cookies are meltin'!

In walks B-squared.

Walks towards the counter, fingers looking dingy from afar. Upon closer inspection, it turns out that his fingers are covered with a shit-consistency substance. After walking past several piles of vomit on the streets of downtown Jax this morning, just about anything has the ability to set me into dry heaves….

B: [Shoves hand toward my face] huhuhhhuhhuhuhhhhh… looks gross, don’t it?

Me: Yep.

B: huhhuhhhheehhhhehhhh… wanna cookie?

Me: I’m straight.

B: huhhuhuhh… Man, it’s hot out there. These cookies are so fresh they are out the oven and melted outside! It’s so hot that I had to wash my hair in the sink next door.

Me: [….taking a half second to realize that this is B I’m talking to, so I gaze up at his scalp…. Yup. Sure enough…] It’s not quite that serious out there.

B: huhhuhhuhuuuhuhu!!!!!huuuhhhhhu!!!!!!hhhuhuhhhuhuhuhuhuhuhhu!hhuuhuhuhhhh!!!

Just as I thought the urge to barf had subsided, he licks his poop fingers with a slurping noise.

FML.

Highlights for the first week of July.

White male dragging young black female down the sidewalk in t-shirt that says [front] “Crack is Whack!” and [back] “Kick Rocks!”


Another highlight, a couple arguing in Hemming Plaza. Female has male pinned to the wall by his neck. Female is in orange tank and blue jean spankys (because they’re far too short to be considered a real-life skirt), golden 4” heels, and tops it off with a purple wig with hot pink highlights. Looks to weigh all of 100 pounds. Male storms off to their Homeless Plaza clique – where argument ensues between Female and another [much larger] female.

Life lesson: No matter how hot you think you are, NEVER underestimate the power of the big girls.

"You're so lucky to work across from a park!"

Yeah, pretty lucky to work across from a park that the homeless play chess in all day. Pee in the brush while staring at you. And rip off the vines of your company's flower pots to shove into a plastic Publix veggie bag. Who needs a nursery when you can drive to your nearest metropolitan center and rip them out of the sidewalk planters!

And here I've been spending all this time studying financial responsibility. All I need to do is watch from my lobby window for a few weeks and take a few pointers to save a buck!

HAPPY FLAG DAY!

There's a three story tall flag hanging in Hemming Plaza...

Flags being handed out to local businesses...

Homeless people whipping flags around and pawning them for beer money...

And a cop backing his cruiser into the tree outside my window.

I've never felt more patriotic.

GOD I love Jacksonville.

Mmm..mmm...mmm... TASTY!

There's a large fountain soda outside of my window. Now, my years of studying and practicing advertising in the workplace tells me that paying a mid-teen to early-twenty year old $5.75 per hour to dress up in logo-covered costume to hustle corners garners attention of passers-by to persuade them to come in and create TOM awareness.

I guess the booty-dancing in costume is supposed to appeal to the downtown demographic? He or she is well on his way to a career in advertising!

I'd snack that.

Let the festival begin!

DOUBLE OR NOTHIN, gotta make up for having a holiday on Monday, I guess!

Guy walks in. Backwards hat. Backpack. Eyebrow ring, three arrow rings through each ear. Shants. Tube socks and kicks. Not one, but two skull necklaces. Creeper ‘stache.

M: Good morning, can I help you?

Guy: [Creepily walks towards me, all six eyes on him and his skull jewelry staring at me] I’m just walkin around town lookin for a job. What do y’all do here? (SIDENOTE: Are we seeing a theme here?! I am my own survey research project! No one knows what we do here.)

M: We’re an advertising agency.

Guy: Okay. Hirin?

M: No. Unfortunately we are in a hiring freeze [lie].

Guy: Oh. Do you accept applications?

M: Of course. Well, we take resumes. This isn’t a Burger King. [Okay so I didn’t say that last part………..but I thought it.]

Guy: (Rolls eyes)..ugh….. Well… you see…. I made some bad choices when I was 17 (clamps both hands together and talks slower, resting his chin on his hands…) that led me to be incarcerated for ten years. I’ve never had a job. No one will help me get a resume together, so I’m working with the Urban League. But, you see… they only meet on Tuesday nights at 9.

M: [Internally laughing at the difficulty of compiling a resume of life, if you’ve never held a job, and also: what’s wrong with Tuesday’s at 9 if you’re not working?] I see.

Guy: (Awkward silence. Keeps standing there. WOODLAND walks in, says good morning and waves, walks in door……. Thanks for leaving me for the dogs a-hole!!!)

Guy: (More awkward silence).

Guy: I’ll have to get one put together. (Stares up at wall) So you do advertising?

M: Yep.

Guy: (Laughs, walks towards door) So like computer art, CAD stuff?

M: Yep [lie…get the F out of here, dude.]

Guy: (Laughs again). Yeah, I could do that. I’m pretty good at some of that Microsoft Windows stuff. I’ve tried CAD a couple times.

Guy: Thanks for your time! I’ll be back when I get a resume! (Goes outside and hops on his BMX bike, rides off).

M: Can’t wait!!!

*******************************************************************************

Bobby. Oh Bobby.

B: Things have been busy at the apartment complex lately. Have I ever told you about my best friend?

M: [Song pops in my hungover head: “Let me tell ya ‘bout my beeessssssssst frienddddd…” from Rob & Big] Nope.

B: Back in ’89, I had this best friend. Me n him? We did everything together. We was great friends. It was so cool. I had this girl I was datin, but she ended up havin his kid.

M: Oh?

B: Yep. He’s moving back to the area now, haven’t seen him in a long time. Sucks just losin your good friend… Now he wants to move into my complex. I’m so excited – it’s like havin my best friend back!

M: Yeah.

B: Filled out the application? He’s got two counts for sex with a 16 year old. 15 counts for faulty checks. I guess he’s been busy since he moved away. (Gets somber) So I don’t know if my friends movin back. My apartment manager won’t let him move in.

M: Well, that’s no fun.

B: Yeah. The 16 year old thing was nothing. He was messing around with her mom. Then he broke up with her and went back to her daughter. The mom got pissed, so pretty sure she’s the one that filed the charges.

M: Oh.

B: Yeah. It’s been nice seeing him though. Just miss the good ole days.

The good ole days, where your BFF knocks up your girlfriend and then dates the mom? You ain’t livin the good life until that shit happens.

Never a dull moment in advertising land...

B: Man, it smells like Lysol in here.

Me: (feeling OCD, because I AM and don’t want to get sick for my visitors!!!!!!!) Yeah, I just sprayed some because this woman just came in sneezing and coughing.

B: I had a can of Lysol. It was one of those little ones. I couldn’t find it anywhere. Sure ‘nuff, I gave up on it figuring it was just gone… then I found it under my bed!

Me: Isn’t that somethin’.

B: Same thing with this big bag of new socks I had!

Me: (thinking: F-ING EWWWWWWWWW) ……….Are they by the Lysol by your bed?

B: Yep they were! I’ve got a pretty good memory. I just dunno where I put stuff!

____________________________________________________________________

Story from Bobby, regarding the Scotty “Pooped Himself” Store.

Homeless Man whom hasn’t showered in weeks, or more, is hanging out at Scotty Store (not the unusual part).

Homeless Man won’t leave.

Scotty Store Owner tells him to get out.

Scotty Store Owner fills bucket.

Scotty Store Owner tosses bucket full of water at Homeless Man, screaming, “I’ll give you a shower!!!!!!! Get out!!!!!!”

Bobby comes back to the office, chuckling and spitting out the story, while handing me a can of Diet Pepsi from the SS.

I’ve got a friend.

I'm on a roll.

I've been finding some ridiculous (read: funny) shit lately.

I can't believe that my blog hasn't morphed into this, already. Someone beat me to the punch.

Really?

You have to be kidding me.

Being sick...

...sucks. Blahhh.

The best years of your life.

Bobby: So you went to Disney World yesterday, huh? That’s so cool.

Me: Yep.

Bobby: Never been there.

Me: Oh.

Bobby: I’ve been to Orlando. Been to Universal to the Hard Rock. There’s just something so refreshing about being around people. Just having a good time. It’s real cool. It feels good.

Me: Yep.

Bobby: You know, I used to do maintenance at a high school! It felt a lot like that. The kids? They used to call me “Cool Guy.” It was real cool. [Insert Family Guy: GIGGITY! Here].It made me feel like I was back in high school. It was a great feeling.

Well, I guess that would explain the 1980 Corvette, huh?

The logic behind Subway's "smokin'" good deal.

Another Wednesday morning, staring out the window and seeing the typical view: homeless checker bets, leaf blowers dragging their job hours out as long as possible, and Subway Dude outside for his 3^rd cigarette of the morning (yes, it’s 10:11 a.m.). Bobby walks in.

Bobby: Out there smokin’ with his friend, again.

Me: He’s always out there.

Bobby: You know, I’ve been getting him a pack of smokes and he gives me a sandwich. That’s our deal. But I’m trying to cut back on eating. Plus…(gets quiet, as if about to share a secret…) I’m kinda gettin’ tired of their sandwiches. Plus – cigarette prices went up!

Me: So don’t get him cigarettes. Who cares.

Bobby: Well, he can’t afford cigarettes. That’s why he gives me a sandwich.

Me: It’s not your problem.

Bobby: Well… I’ll see if I’m hungry later.

More work shenanigan's.

I don't know why my work nickname is Shenanigan's, when it's the ridiculous crap that happens around this place that is the real hootenanny (yep, it's a party, alright. All day every day).

B: Hey they’ve got sandwiches upstairs leftover, do you want me to go grab you anything?

Me: No, I’m alright. Thanks, though.

B: Yeah, me too. This diet thing. I had four Krystal’s at lunch. I’ve got serious gut bomb.

...............................................................................................................

Pause for effect. Yep, that happened.

And the other day?

Bumbling B comes gallivanting through the doors for the 3,761st time today, walks over to the counter and sniffs the candle.

B: It smells like a high school.......... A high school gym locker in here..... Huh.huhuhuhhhh.(his laugh, that's the best I can spell it out).


Bumbling B walks in about 45 minutes ago and this conversation ensues:

B-squared: Do you know much about computers?
Me: Yeah.
B-squared: What does the word 'reboot' mean? My computer last night told me I need to 'reboot the system.'
Me: Restart it.
B-squared: Yeah. I'll try that. I thought that might be it.


Welcome to my life.

Another Friday...

Not much happenin today. Got into work and it smelled like baby bunghole up in this piece. So that was special. I've had a candle burning all day, and ran rampant spraying air freshener so I wouldn't gag all day. It really was that bad, I was probably the least of the over-exaggerated reactions.

I hate sales people. I'm about to turn down two right now, as they walk in the door and try to convince me that their copier is superior to the ones we're using. I love when they come in pairs, all chatty between the two of them, then turning to face me all at the same time and say "hey there!" as they reach in their pockets, frighteningly at the same time and speed, to hand me their business cards as they read their name off it and hand it over, like some prized possession. Ughh.

Anyway... Kickbacks tonight (naturally), but tonight Sarah and Austin are coming out. So hopefully that should prove to be a good time. Tomorrow will probably involve cleaning for the fam to come next week, perhaps seeing some sunshine, and babying the Doze, as his balls have been removed as of today.... sad trombone indeed.

In conclusion, I hate the smell of poop, dispise salespeople and the awkwardness they place on you, and am glad that I am a homo sapien, so as to not have to worry about being knocked out cold and waking up with my body shaved and privately-kept parts missing.

Have a good weekend!

Rough doing a "daily blog" with no internet.

Yep. We're stickin' it to the man, still. We have no internet in our apartment since we can use it all day at work. Plus we have iPhone's. You can't beat that. I can't wait for June's system update. YES! We're not totally in the stone age. Turns out, you plug a few lose wires in, and VOILA! You've got over 100 channels, plus HD, of cable. Things are good.

I tried to post the other day about our cookout, but Blogger was not allowing me to do so. So here I am! The cookout went fantastically. We cleaned all day. The yard is looking good (or maybe not the yard, but the mulched beds are... hopefully the yard will soon). People filed in around 6, and we ended up with about 20 people hanging out :) It was a good time! I think everyone else had fun, which is always good to see. My party anxiety was on for a hot second, while I was hoping that everyone was experiencing optimum fun level. I never know how to be sure, though, with new people (which they all were). So I'm going to take their word for it that they enjoyed themselves.

Anywho: updated house pics! Woot!

Check out those slick lookin baby flowers in the mulched bed! YEAH! Just ignore the tree that's growing out of the old stump. That's coming out later.
Entryway, living room, TV
Dining room, looking into kitchen
Back entrance hallway into kitchen
Back entrance bathroom
Front bathroom
Bedroom

So that's all for now. If you want more YOU'LL HAVE TO COME AND SEE FOR YOURSELF. SO BOOK A FLIGHT! NOW! DO IT! :)

I am fing STARVING. More later.

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

Makes me miss Sands and Amanda that much more, thinking about our kegs and eggs day a few years back.... man where did the years go?

Oh the agony...

...of moving.

We're in our NEW PLACE!!! YAYY!!! We are still unpacking! BOO!

Saturday involved my being a HOSS and helping the BF load up all our stuff into a UHaul at 7 a.m. Good times.

Sad thing is this is "what's left" after half the truck was full, and a car load had already been taken.

See Dozer?

He was NOT happy with us. If he could speak, he would have told us what time it was.

Luckily, there were two more hands for unloading, so it didn't take nearly as long. Now it's just the unpacking that we are still working on. Thus far we have a:

Partial living room.

We also have a:

Bedroom.

We've also got a kitchen & dining room mostly set up... bathrooms mostly together, and the den, 2nd bedroom, and both porches have yet to be fully established. We're getting there. The artwork is coming, and better pictures of the whole shit is coming soon.

Feb 27 to March 2 - 2009

... were the dates of my first visitors! Jenn and Mitch came down to hang out with us, and have a good time in our apartment one last time before we move out of it. They couldn't have been more excited to be here (and I feel like I can speak on their behalf on that, because just wait until you see how elated their faces are in the pics...) and we couldn't have been more excited to have them and show them around town.

Friday was Kickbacks.... naturally. We basically got them at the airport, had the classic "running down the terminal, jumping hugs, excited loud talking" moment, and headed straight there. Beer ensued... as did some seriously delicious jalapeno cheese sticks, chips and salsa, Hamburger Helper (enchilada flavor), breakfast sandwich, fish 'n chips, macaroni and cheese, and I don't even know what else people ordered. Regardless - it was all delicious. After Kickbacks with some people, the four of us headed for London Bridge for more beering and quarters. We then went to the apartment, welcomed them to our "home," and more quarters. I had to crash, because I ran the 10k the next morning (see pics from previous post).

Saturday was my run in the A.M., followed by beach and drinks. Food came after a fiasco at Paco's (DISAPPOINTING... considering how badly all of us wanted Mexican food), so we went to Chicago Pizza across the street (which is much cooler looking from the patio than it is inside). Drinks followed at Fionn MacCools - which was suprisingly UN-douchey. We had two fantastic servers, realized that the best place for four friends to sit at a bar together is at the corner (as opposed to being in a line), and had some secret shots. Good times were had.

Sunday was more of just hanging out together - that's all we were there to do, anyway. We showed them around town. We did a drive-by of our soon-to-be new place. We went to Five Points and had some drinks at Ragland's, and did some shopping at the sweet antique/vintage store over there. We also did some of this:


So that's how that went.

Monday was DISNEY WORLD! We moseyed out of bed, eventually, and got on the road and into Animal Kingdom by noon. Did the walking exhibit to see the tigers. Did some beer and a fantastic jalapeno cheddar pretzel. Did the Flights of Wonder exhibit. Did the safari ride. Did It's Tough To Be a Bug (you can't NOT do that... they loved it). Decided to go to Magic Kingdom next, because they wanted to see the castle (I warned of the children-issue... but I know you "have" to see the castle... so we went). We stayed to see the castle and the teacups, then got the F out of there just in time.

Then there was EPCOT :) I just love that park... everything about it. So we did the beer around the world... which led to this:
This...


Aaaaand this...
All joking aside...... we had a wonderful time with some fantastic friends, and I think we even convinced them to try Jax on for size for after Mitch graduates! So you never know. We might have new neighbors come August :)

What is this!?

Nothing like go big or go home. One of about 45 things on a "resolution list" of sorts, was for me to get my ass to run a 5k. Well, I thought, "why not pony-up? I'll take your 5k and raise you 5, and throw you in the mud for military obstacles!"

This is the 10k Jacksonville Mud Run. You like where that came from?

Courtesy of GlossyFinish.com

So yeah. I ran that with 3 guys from work, and one of those guys' roommates. So we had a team of 5... and we finished 41st out of 198 teams! Yay!

Mitch and Jenn, and the BF were at home sleeping... as we had been out late the night before enjoying each others company. And on that note? Those pictures are to come in the next post. All there is to say: it was a fantastic weekend, with fantastic friends, with good beer and the happiest place on Earth. Can't get a whole lot better than a good weekend with good people.

BAHSTEN, BEEYA, and life.

GREATTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT times in Boston, Mass. So much so, that I'm having one of those "what the hell am I doing with my life in Jacksonville?" days, missing Amanda and Theo.

We got to Boston on Friday around noon-time. Had our running-through-the-airport moment with Amanda n Teddy, and got ourselves a taxi. Ohhh the taxi. We walk up, and the guy is not paying attention. Mike asks if the four of us and our luggage will fit, he says "yeah." Well, his entire front seat looked like we were about to hop into a truck drivers truck after about two weeks straight on the road. There was no seat. There was wrappers, papers, garbage, snacks, and a box of Frosted Flakes. Regardless, we toss our shit in and the guy offers a towel for Mike to sit on for our trip. HA. Not only this, but he has the bullet-proof glass slider on lock between the front seat and the back seat, so the three of us are laughing and carrying on in the back, all the while inable to hear or say anything to Mike or the cabby up front. PS the guy had serious coke pinky nails... yes two..

MmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmCOKE!

Anyway. So we got checked into the hotel, not the motel, the HOL...I...DAY...INNNNNN and dropped our shit off. Then we headed off to meet Dan and Maureen. After walking in the bitter cold/wind for about 20 minutes, we found them, and ate at Whiskey's Steakhouse for some good lunch and beers. Amanda and I had a blueberry ale that was pretty delish. After this, they went to the Sam Adam's brewery tour, and Maureen and I went to Faneuil Hall. For the most part, for us, this was a bust... .so we went somewhere where everybody knows your name........CHEERS! We asked the guy if he'd never been to Boston and had two days to see some cool things, what he would do........ and he said "House of Blues." I wanted to say to go stuff himself, but I resisted. So we went on a mini walking tour of Freedom Trail - until it got to be wayyyyyyyyy too cold. We turned around and went to Houston's for another drink, until everyone else met up.

At this point, the only things I've bought myself are gloves. Damnit.

We go to Kingfish Hall for dinner... which was the furthest thing from being anything I would like, but oh well. When in Boston... man up and watch other people eat seafood til their hearts content. Jessica, a friend from college, met up after dinner and showed us over to Little Italy, where we went to a mafia/mob bar. Literally - the kind of place with low lighting, expensive wine, and dudes in suits standing everywhere just watching. This is not a joke. But regardless, it was great to see her and catch up a bit.

Saturday was pretty awesome. Like, start to finish. We got up and around, and started the day with a little muffin and bev's on the corner at Au Bon Pain. This was the day of the engagement pictures... so we started at the coffee shop! Perhaps a lil insight into how the day went, pre-Photoshop? Eh?

A typical morning with the two of them :) (click the pick to see it without the weird crop..grr)

Continued March 6th... I know, I'm behind schedule.

So the picture taking was awesome. We went up and down the streets of Beacon Hill and sat on some pretty stoops and took some shots, and some in front of pretty wrought-iron fencing. We also found out that we were literally "over the hill" from Boston Common. It was pretty in the winter... I can only imagine how beautiful it must be in warmer climates.

The beer festival? FANTASTIC. I mean where else can you pay $40 and drink 2-ounce pours of over 100 different flavors of beer?! It was definitely crowded, the line an hour before go-time was around the corner! Always good to see people loving some tasty beers. I can't wait to see some of the "new" beers in the stores... since most of the ones I was in love with are only poured draft in the bars in their respective locations nationwide.

A good italian dinner followed...mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm CARBS!

That night, the BF didn't feel so hot, so he fell asleep at the hotel. Amanda, Teddy Tio, and myself decided to have ourselves a little night. We went to the "real" Cheers (to say we did it) and had a beer and good convo with the super-friendly bartender. He helped us to the next area of bars, and ended up at an irish-saloon place (a-la McFaddens... loud, bro, and bitches). We left after a beer and went to Rock-Bottom Brewery, which is a brewhouse/restaurant. It's dim-lit, some good beers for a restaurant, and pretty large. Nice decor. Quiet. We stayed here until late and had some good conversation and drinks. Amanda had a handful of martinis until she was feeling good... haha... and they both had a second dinner.

All in all, Boston was a fantastic time... I can't wait to go back again and see it in the warm months and full blooms. Until then, here's a few more engagement pics that have been completed. I'm trying my best to keep to my word of two weeks...but we are moving and have had friends in town!

Click the pic to see it without the weird crop....grrr

It's official.

I'm a Florida resident! I just got back from taking my license pic at the DMV. You just know that's always a good time waiting to happen. Luckily for me, I made an "appointment" to have this done. Unluckily for me, either Florida or Michigan's system "went down," and I STILL had to wait... though not as long as the other 150 people crammed into the 30x30' space that is the Jacksonville area Department of Motor Vehicles.

Highlight? Walking out of the place with my new license (that I look ridiculous in, as the girl snapped the picture while I wasn't paying attention) and there is a woman and her (approximately 4 year old) son, carried by his arm... "YAYYY!! This means we don't gots to be afraid of the police no mo!!!" followed by squeals from the young'n. I wanted to laugh my ass off, but I was right in front of her. So I waited til I got in my car and busted up..... until I realized my sun roof was wide open. So I called Jennifer to share in my laughter. That all happened.

Sooo.... that's ONE thing off of the gigangic list of things that I need to do for myself, including:
1) Visiting tax attorney's office to transfer my title to Florida
2) Getting plates and tags for my vehicle
3) Finding a dentist
4) Finding a doctor
5) Get 6 month teeth cleaning appointment (currently due for)
6) Get cavity filled (currently PASTTT due for)
7) Visit new doctor, establish relationship, demand answers to my dry skin predicament
8) Pay for all of the beforementioned, somehow.
9) Find new place to live before May 1... if not before April 1

IN OTHER NEWS!

Mitch and Jenn are coming to JACK TOWN!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Not only that, but I beat out a trip to JAMAICA! They were between coming to Jax to see us, or going to Jamaica... yeah! So they'll be here next Friday, and then we're going to DISNEY WORLD ON MONDAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!

I AM SO EXCITED FOR THE NEXT FEW WEEKS!

What an outstanding weekend.

All things are good.

Friday was another good night at Kickbacks.

Saturday was doing my part to revive the economy by dropping a fat grand on hair, tires, dinner, and Matrix Trilogy box set in Blu-Ray. Yep, that all happened. So much for the budget.

Sunday was the DONNA MARATHON... which was SO fun and SO inspiring. I'm pretty sure we want to run it next year... whether it be the full or the half. There's no reason why a 79 year old man can finish 26.2 miles and I can't... that's just a slap in my fat ass to get serious. The idea of running that far makes my head explode... do you know how far that is?

For my Flint readers: it's from Applebees on Miller Road to OWOSSO.

View Larger Map

For my Grand Rapids readers? A marathon is like RUNNING, no STOPPING, from Grand Haven to WALKER:

View Larger Map

MY GOD.

Valentine's Day Eve Eve

Fun weekend ahead!

Okay week behind!

THE OFFICE PART 2 OF 2 TONIGHT :)



Laura's grandmother passed away yesterday morning, early. Rest in peace, Grandma Betty.

Dozer has started running alongside us during bike rides this week.

Work has had it's ups and downs... nothing terrible. Nothing a good lunch-vent couldn't take care of, anyway. Our director of account services is officially leaving the company as of March 13th... to move into a position that is perfect for him. He's a very artsy guy, and this will allow him a lot of artistic freedom and happiness in his new venture.

People still pee and stare at me from the bushes outside of the office.

No crazy people at work this week, thankfully.

I've almost got my tax information collected, and it appears I'm going to be leaps and BOUNDS ahead of where I am now as far as paying off a credit card. WOOT to me (and see other blog!)!

SEVEN DAYS UNTIL BOSTON! ONE WEEK FROM TOMORROW MORNING WE WILL BE TOUCHING DOWN AT SNOWY LOGAN INTERNATIONAL! YAYAYAYAYAYYYY! I cannot WAIT to see Amanda, Theo, and the beautiful city and all of it's beer-drinking greatness!

Tomorrow: Work, KICKBACKS... beer me!!!
Saturday: Hiking @ Little Talbot Island with the Doze and the BF, driving around Riverside for a new home, shmancy dinner with the BF somewhere of his choosing, concert @ The Pit.
Sunday: RISE N SHINE at 3:30 a.m. or so..... get out to the beach at 4:45 a.m. to volunteer for the Donna Breast Cancer Marathon (26.2 With Donna)! WOO HOO! I'm excited, really... though it'll be rough showing it at 4 a.m. Afternoon? Grocery shopping (ick). And RELAXING.

So that's where I'll be this weekend!

OH! And I've got a new phone number as of next week... so ask for that (to my three loyal viewers, haha). Also means NO MORE PHONE BILL FOR ME! MONEY IN DA BANK, SHAWTY WHAT YA DRANK!

Kidding.

Have fun at the Lupe show tonight, B! Can't wait to see a few pics. I'm sure it'll be a blast.

Until next time...

Don't even try to challenge Dozer in his badassness.

Mini advertising, gigantic impression.

I think that advertising is pretty neat. Obviously, I studied it for four years, and have been working in it for three at this juncture. But this is the latest that has me impressed. Mini advertising is always outstanding. Always interesting, intriguing... all the things a good ad should be. Well done.

Ever get those days when you feel like everyone is annoyed with you? I'm having one of those... and I totally don't get why. But it's driving me nuts. I feel like everyone at work is ready to freak out on me for no reason.

Maybe more later? You never do know.

People like to be pissed. haha

Another successful weekend down the pipe!

Friday we visited a new place (for us) called Kickbacks. It was badass... it's totally a Michigan style bar, through and through. I can't wait for next Friday to go there again :)

Saturday was a good day. Got up and took the Doze to the doggy park to hang out with other Boxer's. After that, went and had a DEEEELISH submarine sandwich from Firehouse Subs. Mike went his separate way for his bands photo shoot. I, on the other hand, took Dozer and myself out to drive down A1A for a little road trip. We ended up in St. Augustine after a rather dramatic drive where I needed to find a bathroom STAT as did Dozer..... as evidenced by the pee on my door. Cool. So we got down there, walked around at Vilano Beach.... and watched Dozer dig himself a wild-man-style hole (where he whips himself into a frenzy, thrashing sand all over and flipping around in circles... kinda like this:)




After this little drive, we headed home to hang out at the apartment for a bit. We went to see Slumdog Millionaire last night. GREAT movie. It really is worth all the praise and accolades that people have been giving it. I was hoping that it wasn't going to be one of those feelings afterwards like "god everyone's hyped this shit up so much, now it just sucks." Nope, not at all. It really is a great movie. Great concept, great story, great execution. It's just so crazy to step outside of the little box that is your life, even if it is only in the form of seeing a movie like this. This is people's lives. And we couldn't even imagine... what they've seen... what they've lived through... how they live on a daily basis.

Today? Good day, all around. Got up early (for a Sunday).. got the Walmart trip and tax crap out of the way before 11 a.m. From there, we cleaned up the apartment for a bit. We ran around town and checked out what's new in the retail world. Circuit City is going out of business, so we checked out two of those. I have always wanted a GPS in my car... and soooo....

Ta-da! Copped 'dat for 30% off. It's a basic model, and it's the smaller one. I don't like big honkin' things hanging in my dash. I'm not particularly thrilled about having this chillin in my window, but I'll find a place, I'm sure. Now i'm just pumped for a road trip! :) :) :) :) :)

Watchin the Grammy's, now! Travis Barker as well as Mark & Tom made their appearance together.... to announce they're getting back together! We'll see how that goes. Good to see something like what happened to Travis (plane crash) not stop him from doing what he loves.

At this juncture, we have some exciting visitors coming to town in the next two months! Mitch & Jenn want to come down at the end of this month... my parents + Kaitlyn and possibly my grandma want to come the first week of April... and Katrina wants to come the weekend my family leaves! YAYYYAYAYAYYY!! I'm so excited to see familiar faces, soon!

Took Doze out on his first bike ride tonight. It was a complete SUCCESS! YES! That means the beach cruisers are coming out of retirement and back to the beach! He did great, trotting/jogging right alongside Mike's bike. The only trouble was the way back from the Gate when I was in front, where Dozer decided to do like his Siberian Husky cousins and pull Mike like he were an Iditerod Dog Sled Champion Leader. Pretty funny, regardless.

Time to wind down this Sunday... we'll see where the week takes us :) TWELVE DAYS UNTIL BOSTON, HERE WE COME!

The personalities of Jax.

Lady walks in, arm full of magazines. Long skirt. Knit cap. Jacket. Pink lipstick. No odor. I’d almost think she was normal, minus the mega-waddle she walked with.

And then she opened her mouth.

Me: Good afternoon, how can I help you? (All smiles.)
Her: I’m good! I’m good. Is this a travel agency?
Me: No, this is an advertising agency.
Her: Oh. So if I want my business to do advertising, I come to you. (Moves in closer to counter)
Me: Yes.
Her: What’s the price? (Closer still.)
Me: Well it depends on your whole package. It’ll depend on your ad campaign, your media buys, the whole thing.
Her: So give me a range. What’s the prices? Doncha have a sheet? (…….closer)
Me: It depends on what elements you need done.
Her: SO TV COMMERCIALS? WHAT BE THE PRICE? (Leaning in so close I feel like she’s going to swallow me into the GIANT, GAPING HOLE THAT IS HER NON-EXISTENT FRONT TOOTH.)
Me: It would depend on if you want local or cable TV, the channel, the time frame, the program………
Her: SO YOU DON’T HAVE NO PRICES? NO PRICE SHEET?
Me: (Looks over at Mark Berman…. Yes, I was not the only one in the lobby watching this shit go down.) You can take Jim’s card to talk to h……………..
Her: FO GET IT! (FLAILING her arm in the air, practically tossing the magazines and hitting me in the face, waddling off….. taking a full, and fully awkward, 30 seconds to make it to the door and exit, then stares through the window as she walks away and Mark laughs at her through the glass).

F my life. I should put this shit on that Web site……….. www.FMyLife.com .

Successful weekend, hello February!

So great weekend! Friday went out with Sarah for some drinks at London Bridge and Burrito Gallery (which has Obie on tap, WOOT!). Chatted and had some good convo just regarding life, relationships, work, and the like. It was so good to talk to someone in this town and have my own friend... though we admitted to each other that we're the only social outlet that we have for each other, and we rarely have a chance to talk at work.

Saturday was 18 (well...16) holes of golf. It was fantastic - great shots, good beer, good people, good fun... I can't believe that I actually hit the ball straight after not touching my clubs in months. Apparently I'm getting good at flexing my beer muscle...because I never used to be able to drink and golf at the same time.

"Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam..."

Today was doggie dog park, grocery shopping, cleaning a bit, and making our fried food. I don't even want to talk about the fried food fiasco... because everyone is in aching pain from the food that we all ate. Gross. But it was nice being social and going out for the super bowl game :)

This is the most outrageous episode of The Office, ever. Oh boy.

Things that bother, irritate, & piss me off.

• Debt, will always be #1 til it's gone

• Slow computers, namely MINE.
• Writing something with pen, then moving the sheet of paper and getting a blob on your finger, or better yet, the perfect transparency of what you wrote tatted onto your appendage.
• Harassing homeless people (yep, I just went there. Don't care. I'm tired of it. And I'm especially tired of their hootin, hollarin, whistling, and uncompromisable banter about how I look.)
• People peeing publicly in downtown Jacksonville, Florida. Or peeing in any area that is not a room with a pot in it, for that matter. Just because you have a weiner doesn't mean the whole world needs to see it as you relieve yourself. I've got a vadge, you don't see me flashing it around.
• The inability to find clothes for girls & women sized over 5'5". See previous blog.
• Politics. And people who think they're hard-wired to believe in things democratically or republicanny. Get over it. It's just how you were brought up - it doesn't mean you're right.
• My general inability to find a friend in, or within 1,000 miles, of Jacksonville, Florida.

I'm not out to have a negative post today. Just a few things brought these to light today and I was beginning to lose my head.

Now onto happier things...

Oh, Chicago. We'll be home soon.

Man, I suck.

I continue to think, "hey! I'm going to post about this today!" And yet, as soon as that thought comes to mind (generally while at work), the phones instantly start ringing off the hooks and I get busy again. So alas, no blogs.

Not much today either. I'm in a semi-foul mood lately and I can't shake it. However, this is a ray of laughter on an otherwise cloudy day (what?):

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

I feel like my blog is slowing down, pathetically, already. Nothing exciting has gone down these past few days :( I'm still miffed at my brother. Still haven't talked to a supposed friend. Still don't know if I'm in her wedding. Still miss everyone ridiculously too much. Still need to pay off my debts (and still haven't started my PF blog).

So for something fun to look at...


SURPRISE! That isn't the "real" inauguration!

It's LEGOS!!!!!!

I'm easily entertained.

"Here's the thing when it comes to different social and political issues. Your personal beliefs are hindering my ideal society. You take abortion and make it into your moral issue, it is anything but, its a choice for her alone, get the fuck out of her business. You still dwell on 9/11 and revenge. So someone in your family was "murdered" and you want Gitmo to remain open. Despite the constitution which states the natural laws which we "all" are entitled too. Do you even know the Bill of Rights? Forgive those who trespass on you you bigot. You think not being in Iraq counts as a loss. What the hell is it with Americans and losing? Losing, we've already lost. About $7.4 million an hour. You have screwed your and my future children for life. We want to make America strong. Wanna make it strong, build new schools, hire better teachers, help impoverished cities, invest in stem cell research, ect. it is so obvious. We can't continue this level of consumption. Why can't you see this? You might be fundie. In which case don't talk to me. I relish your individualism but I hate you when your with your pals. Think for yourself fascist. Around 11% of your countrymen, Americas children, our brothers and sisters go to bed hungry every night. Lets focus our resources in other directions. Make a stranger smile today. Breath. Being a productive member of society is more than going to your job, paying your taxes, then cracking a beer while you watch the new season of 24, or Real World. That's your world, not the real world. It is small, uninteresting, boring, and hopeless.... A F-150 pickup / assault rife is no substitute for a small prick you prick. Don't even get me started on your failed drug policies. Ron Paul, sorry to say had it right on the Robert Downey Jr. Show. Helicopter parents, STOP!!! sheltering your children. You can't get back your innocence but the world is anything but innocent. Let them learn that....."
-Nick Faccini, classmate at GVSU

Minus being angry, I mostly share in the sentiment. I'm over all of the nay-sayers (the few that are trying to bring people down from yesterdays high). Yesterday was a country of happiness. People from all over the world were coming HERE to share in this celebration saying that they're JEALOUS of NOT being an American! So shut your asses and keep your pessimism to yourself for a little while. We had 8 years to get that pissed at Bush, and with reason. Maybe Obama isn't going to fix anything, but I can't see it getting any worse. He's a good person, and for that alone, I trust his judgment.

Maybe all for the day? Who knows.

I WANNA MARRY BARRY!

I love me some Barack Obama!

He's just wonderful. He's *OFFICIALLY* President of the United States - and I've literally never felt more excited, patriotic, or just plain proud of our country. I was in tears watching him being sworn in, and just seeing him standing there with his beautiful family is just enough to make your heart burst.

Today is a good day, America. Bravo.

The benefits and irritations of being tall.

Benefit: You can reach products placed on the top shelf with ease.
Irritation: You have random strangers tap your shoulder to help them grab products place on the top shelf.

Benefit: You can see above others in a crowd.
Irritation: People behind you are PISSED and tell you to "crouch down."

Benefit: You're tall! You got the gene that didn't make you a short person!
Irritation: Your whole life you hear, "MY GOD YOU'RE TALL," or some variation thereof.

Benefit: Being tall makes you look slender.
Irritation: Being tall means you will never, ever have clothes that actually fit you the way they were meant to fit by the designer. And it'll take you at least 2x as long to find them, and 4x as much if you want anything lengthened.

Benefit: You could ride roller coasters when you were practically just out of the womb.
Irritation: A whole new element of terror comes into play while riding Space Mountain, Millennium Force, or the like, thinking that you are too tall, the lap bar isn't adequately locked in due to how far your knees are folded and shoved into your chest, and you think your neck will be severed like the last day of a chicken in a chicken factory (ew.).

Benefit: You can see above the steering wheel.
Irritation: No car made anywhere in the world really comfortably fits anybody in the 6 ft+ range. No matter what the commercials tell you, your head will always brush the roof of the interior or worse. And the "seat back" position no longer is a "pimped style" seating position, it's simply the position the seat must be placed in order for you to have knee room and enough space between the wheel and your chest so that in the off-chance that some freak accident should occur, your body won't be blown through the back seat by a "life saving air bag deployment system."

Benefit: You're a tall female.
Irritation: You're a tall female - leaving you with approximately 15% of the gene pool to choose from when it comes to picking a life partner, unless you're comfortable with feeling like you're making someone else your bitch.

oh yeah, baby. You know you want a hunk of THIS.

Like I said. There's a lot of irritations and hinderances that come along with being TALL. And I'm not even that tall when you really think about it. Oh well. Such is life.

SCRABBLE made me do it

I missed a post for yesterday, DAMMIT.

We were gone all day long, and then we had Dan and Maureen over to play Scrabble and hang out, and the clock ticked midnight before I had a post.

Really we just ran around all day looking at rental houses (found a perfect one, lost the perfect one) and eating at 5GBNF (5 Guys Burgers And Fries, I shortened it).

Nothing more.

Nothing funny from me this morning, I'm still waking up.

More later?

I'm turning into a nerd the more I read.

I want my budget to be SEXY. Ugh. If my budget were a visual, it'd be this... angry, big, and ugly.

FRIDAY IS MY FAVORITE

Okay, so maybe not my absolute favorite. But nothing beats that YESSSSSS ITS ALMOST TIME FOR THE WEEKEND feeling when you're winding down in the office on a Friday afternoon. It's this weird excitement, even though you probably have absolutely diddly to actually do all weekend... that's just the point. Nothing. To. Do. Other than play with the puppy, and hang out with the BF and some friends, of course. Andddd lay around with a beer in hand.

So, on the note of getting out of the office for the weekend. Here is my story for the week in the life of a phone girl downtown Jacksonville.

Flannelled man walks in with a limp after peering into window at me.

Flannel: Hiya ma’am yallshirn?
Me: Hi there, can I help you?
Flannel: Yes ma’am, yallshirnmnn?
Me: What was that, I’m sorry?
Flannel: Yallshirnmnmm!
Me: What.

JoAnn walks around corner.

JoAnn: Can I help you?
Flannel: Yallshirnmmn?
JoAnn: Excuse me?
Flannel: (hands over a crumpled sheet of paper) I need your signature. I gots to keep my food stamps comin. Yall any jobs?
JoAnn: No we do not.
Flannel: Well I need your signature. I neejatuh sign dis. Right here! Sign dis sayin I came in tuh get a job and you said no! I gots tuh keep my food stamps comin. I gots to eat!
JoAnn: I’m not signing your paper, you didn’t apply for anything.
Flannel: I GOTS TO EAT! Just sign this paypuh sayin I came in for a job! You don’t have no job! I need my stamps! I just gots to get 12 signatures.
JoAnn: (Stares at him, his aroma filling the air like a wet dog tearing into a garbage bag of leftover eggs) I’ll sign your paper. Don’t come back.
Flannel: Thank you ma’am! Thank you! Happy new year!

NO ONE SAYS HAPPY NEW YEAR 2 WEEKS INTO THE NEW YEAR. TAKE YOUR STANK AND YOUR STAMPS AND GET THE F OUT.

Yep. That all happened. Like I said, I need to make a comic strip and mail it around to the office. Apparently I'm the office riot, too bad this shit is true and not just a made up funny joke. I guess it makes it funnier.

On another note. Justin clued me into PF blogs. I think I might start a second blog alongside this project, one focused on becoming debt free. I'm serious about it, and it sounds so motivational. And I think posting a blog and tracking my results may get me even more motivated. If only I could get my cards gone to $0 within a few months, I'd be able to focus on the student loan and car payoffs only. That would be AMAZING. Not to mention a personal wedding fund that would be nice to have started.

ENJOY THE WEEKEND EVERYONE! HAPPY BIRTHDAY BEEEEEEJ AND HAPPY 21ST BIRTHDAY TO MY BRO!

I am just in a SUPERB mood.

I don't know what my problem is, but I'm ready to do like Eve in Wall-E and just start blowin shit up.

I'm tired of ringing phones.
I'm tired of pissed off clients.
I'm over being cold in Florida.
I'm WAY over not having any normal people in this town to hang out with, other than my boyfriend and Dozer (which, bt, is not a problem, it would just be nice to grow the group at some point).
When did my attitude take a nose dive, today? Wtf.

Another comic strip to add to the Dalton collection. The following is from Day 4:

Skirted person meanders into the office while I’m making a call to replace toner.

Me: “Good afternoon, one second!”

Skirted person: (Fiddles by awards/trophies like Heath Ledger in the Dark Knight)

Me: (Putting phone on hold) “I’m sorry, ma’am… can I help you with something?”

Skirted person: (Yanks on office door)

Me: “Can I help you?”

Skirted person: (slowly walks towards me, now I can see that the barrette is holding a fake weave, the skirt is tattered, sunglasses are on inside the office, and……….SURPRISE! Skirted person is a MAN!) “What kind of agency is this?”

Me: “We do advertising and marketing.”

Skirted MAN: “Do you do demographics?”

Me: “What.”

Skirted MAN: (Turns around and leaves, leaving his FRESH aroma in his wake. And when I say fresh….. I mean I reached down for the bottle of Room Freshening Spray in Citrus Fresco that Ammy left behind).

Happy Day 4 to me.

The sad thing is that this is literally what happens. This isn't even exaggerating just for being funny. I wish I were a drawer (draw-er, drawwer, one who draws, not the sliding cabinet), so I could whip some funny shit on the fly.

So despite my bad mood... my mood just increased 217 points because I just got PAIDDDD TODAY! Turns out not having a state tax is THE BOMB for my check! WOOT!

Posting backwards: First day at Dalton, Jan 5-09

So I have started my new job in Florida at the place I was interning with, the Dalton Agency. Guess I did something right. Just as I was getting to my wits end with this whole Jacksonville - thing, the job comes through in the clutch! Woo! So mostly my day consists of a whole lotta "Dalton Agency, good morning" and smiling. And sorting mail. But at the very least, I'm outside of WoodCreek, and I'm seeing human beings on a daily basis... which is nice. Except that our office is downtown. By the courthouse. Next to a park. That homeless people mingle about in and prostitution used to occur daily, particularly on Saturday's at 11 a.m., on the corner approximately 100 feet away (this is what my USPS delivery man told me... I wouldn't question this guy. You wouldn't either).

Well, here's my memorable Day 1 at Dalton:

Two members of the community just came rollin up in with their backpacks, sneakers, and one-leg of the sweat pants rolled up. This is the conversation that ensued:

Two girls: "What is dis?"
Me: "This is the Dalton Agency. We're an advertising and marketing business."
Two girls: "What do you do here?"
Me: "We do advertising.... (blank looks received).... for clients in Jacksonville.. like TV... radio... "
Two girls: "Oh. How do you get in the club?"
Me: "What."
Two girls: "Yall hirin?"
Me: "No."

Did I mention the girl had a yellow/gold grille in her teeth?

Happy first day to me.