It's been awhile...

....but not long enough to write a real blog, yet.

We moved back to Michigan. Seriously. That happened. We arrived August 3, I believe. I can't believe that we're back here. Living with Kev. In GRap. It's so weird yet so right.

There's more to be said, on that topic... but I'm too tired. Certainly will post more on this notion later.

I'm 24. Good god.

-Meg

The things I'll miss...

You know the kind. You hear them coming well before you see them... But you know what you're about to encounter, anyway. The loud-talking into the cell phone is only the beginning.

Dangling plastic heart earrings.

Tight, light grey stretch pants. Camel everywhere. Insert vomit here.

Hot pink tee with Japanese character that inquisitively asks, "Cuddle?"

Oh yeah. Bring it in for the real thing, baby.

Life In My Family.

My sister wants to fly one way to come down and drive home with me for the big move. Having never flown before, she's a little confused and befuddled by the flight booking past the 10 day mark thing. Apparently, so are my parents, as shown as this rapid fire series of texts from the sister...

K: how come it was 89 before?
K: what the fuckkkkkk
K: god damn indiscisives
K: call dad
K: call the house he accidentally hung up on you

Welcome to my world.

Mother of the year.

Interactive freelancer walks in.

He says, "I just walked by a mom and baby getting into a car, and I notice that the baby has a helmet on.


"I think to myself, 'Why does a kid that young have a helmet on? Weird.’


"Then the mom goes to put the kid in the car, and whacks it's head on the car doorframe."

It's so hot my cookies are meltin'!

In walks B-squared.

Walks towards the counter, fingers looking dingy from afar. Upon closer inspection, it turns out that his fingers are covered with a shit-consistency substance. After walking past several piles of vomit on the streets of downtown Jax this morning, just about anything has the ability to set me into dry heaves….

B: [Shoves hand toward my face] huhuhhhuhhuhuhhhhh… looks gross, don’t it?

Me: Yep.

B: huhhuhhhheehhhhehhhh… wanna cookie?

Me: I’m straight.

B: huhhuhuhh… Man, it’s hot out there. These cookies are so fresh they are out the oven and melted outside! It’s so hot that I had to wash my hair in the sink next door.

Me: [….taking a half second to realize that this is B I’m talking to, so I gaze up at his scalp…. Yup. Sure enough…] It’s not quite that serious out there.

B: huhhuhhuhuuuhuhu!!!!!huuuhhhhhu!!!!!!hhhuhuhhhuhuhuhuhuhuhhu!hhuuhuhuhhhh!!!

Just as I thought the urge to barf had subsided, he licks his poop fingers with a slurping noise.

FML.

Highlights for the first week of July.

White male dragging young black female down the sidewalk in t-shirt that says [front] “Crack is Whack!” and [back] “Kick Rocks!”


Another highlight, a couple arguing in Hemming Plaza. Female has male pinned to the wall by his neck. Female is in orange tank and blue jean spankys (because they’re far too short to be considered a real-life skirt), golden 4” heels, and tops it off with a purple wig with hot pink highlights. Looks to weigh all of 100 pounds. Male storms off to their Homeless Plaza clique – where argument ensues between Female and another [much larger] female.

Life lesson: No matter how hot you think you are, NEVER underestimate the power of the big girls.

"You're so lucky to work across from a park!"

Yeah, pretty lucky to work across from a park that the homeless play chess in all day. Pee in the brush while staring at you. And rip off the vines of your company's flower pots to shove into a plastic Publix veggie bag. Who needs a nursery when you can drive to your nearest metropolitan center and rip them out of the sidewalk planters!

And here I've been spending all this time studying financial responsibility. All I need to do is watch from my lobby window for a few weeks and take a few pointers to save a buck!